NUCC

Pentecost 13

September 3, 2006

Song of Songs 2:8-13

James 1:17-27

            “Lead with your ears, follow up with your tongue, and let anger straggle along in the rear.”  This how Eugene Peterson puts the Greek of James into modern day English.  Back in the early days of the Christian church a man named James urged the little dispersed Jewish-Christian communities to live lives of justice and compassion.  The first step, he said, was to “lead with your ears.”  Or in the words of the New Revised Standard Version, “Be quick to listen.”  And in the German version of your pew Bibles, Die Gute Nachrictht:  „Jeder soll stets bereit sein zu hören.“  ---- Be ready to listen.  But I like the way Peterson puts it.  “Lead with your ears.”

             How good are you at “leading with your ears?”  Can you picture somebody who leads with his ears?  Maybe it’s more helpful to think of your dog, perking up her ears, turning her head, aware of something you can’t see.  I can picture that.  Mouth shut.  Mind alert.  And ears ready to hear.

            Think of the times when you have led with your mouth instead of your ears and the dire consequences which followed.  All of us can think of times when we wish we had listened instead of spoken ----- especially when we spoke in anger.  James, who has sometimes been called a New Testament wisdom writer, offers us some very practical advice.   

This practical wisdom about listening first, keeping cool and letting anger “straggle along in the rear” might also reflect back on the interesting piece of scripture you heard Jenny Romens Erickson read.  The Song of Solomon, which is actually a love poem, is attributed to Solomon, the king who asked for wisdom instead of riches.  (Do you remember the ABCs of Wisdom from two weeks ago?)

Think of what it means to be wise in a romantic relationship.  Especially what it means to be wise in marriage.  When I work with couples preparing for marriage one of the topics we investigate is communication.  In another words listening.  How many jokes do you women make about us men and our lack of listening skills?  (What’s the most common cause of hearing loss among men?  When his wife says she wants to talk to him.)  How do we listen to one another?  Really hearing one another.  Catching the feelings as well as the words.  Catching the tone of voice.  Looking for the facial expression.  Maintaining eye contact.

Researchers point out that 93% of interpersonal communication depends upon interpreting nonverbal cues.  Only 7% depends on words, whereas 38% depends on tone of voice and 55% depends on facial expression, posture, eye contact and gestures.  Listening actually means leading with more than our ears.  Listening means using all of our senses to be in touch with one another and ultimately to be in touch with God.  Listening involves our whole self ---- mind, body and emotion.

I learned that lesson back in 1969 when I spent a summer at Worchester State Hospital in Massachusetts in a program called Clinical Pastoral Education.  I had just finished my first year at Eden Seminary.  As a result of some inadequacies discovered in the dreaded oral exam each first year student had to take, I was encouraged to spend the summer learning to listen ----- to patients at the mental hospital, to my fellow students in small, intense groups, and to myself and my feelings.

This was a hard summer.  I learned that I had a hard time actually listening to people ----- listening beyond the superficial, beyond the facts, beyond the intellectual stuff.  Listening to feelings.  Feeling with other people.   I had to learn the truth which  Deborah van Deusen Hunsinger  discovered:

“There is a divine drama hidden in each person’s story that cries out to be heard.” 

I had to make the same discovery Martin Buber made when a young man came to him.  They had a nice, superficial conversation.  And then the young man left.  Later Buber discovered that this young man committed suicide a few days after the visit.

Buber felt like he had done this young man a disservice.  He had listened, but he had not really heard what was going on in this young man’s life.   This young man had come to him for help, but Buber did not help.   He realized the challenge of truly being open to another person.  Martin Buber came to understand that faith is not the pursuit of ecstatic experiences, but rather a life of attentiveness to others, the life of “I and thou” in encounter.

“Lead with your ears.”  Be attentive to one another.  Make yourself present to one another.  This is a worthy challenge for all of us.  I find it challenging to make myself fully attentive to both God and God’s people.  My usual practice in the morning is to read some verses from scripture in a little booklet called Losungen.  Then I meditate on those verses, attempting to hear what they have to say.  Then I sit in silence, praying.  I speak to God and offer prayers of intercession.  Then I try to listen to God, waiting for God’s wisdom.  That’s the hardest part.  Emptying my mind.  Opening myself to God ---- and waiting.  Sometimes the wait is a long time and I give up. Other times I get the feeling that God is there, nudging me forward.  It’s a challenge to sit silently in God’s presence.

It is also a challenge to sit silently in one another’s presence.  Listening to one another, “leading with our ears.”  But also using our eyes to catch the body language.  Also using our intuition to catch the emotion.  Also using our voice to ask helpful questions.  Always remaining open to one of God’s children.  This is our challenge and our joy as we live in this world with God and God’s people.

This is the life which God has given us.  Enjoy.

Amen.